With the Milwaukee Brewers defeating the Seattle Mariners in T-Mobile Park 6-0 Monday night, the team is one win away from 12 wins in a row. And you know what that means…

Yep, if the Crew beats the Mariners again on Tuesday night (game time is 8:40 p.m. CST), Wisconsin fine dining stalwart George Webb will hand out free burgers—or free burger vouchers—at a later date. The Webb franchise has had to make good on its longstanding promotion only twice in Brewers/Webb history: in 1987, and 2018.

Speaking of 2018, I totally got my free burger back then, and I totally wrote about it. And, in the spirit of folks who had done unique things with their 1987 burgers—kept them in freezer for 30 years, bronzed them, etc.—I buried mine in a time capsule in the woods and dug it up a year later. Yeah, it didn’t make much sense and people got weirdly angry about it. I tried.

What will I do if I get a free Webb burger in 2025? I’m not sure yet. (I do know I won’t be picking it up on Oakland Avenue.) But in the meantime, let’s revisit the 2018 article where I buried my burger, and the 2019 article where I dug it up. GO BREWERS.

I buried a free George Webb burger in a time capsule in the woods and will unearth it one year from now (2018)

By Matt Wild

On Thursday, October 18, 2018, Wisconsin burger chain George Webb made good on a longstanding promise/promotion and handed out free hamburgers to celebrate the Milwaukee Brewers’ recent 12-game winning streak. From 2 to 6 p.m., thousands upon thousands of people took advantage of this promise/promotion. Folks across the state dutifully lined up outside their friendly neighborhood Webbs. They slowly shuffled inside. They were handed a free burger. They walked out. It was amazing.

I was among those people. At about 1:30 p.m., I got in line outside the George Webb on Oakland Avenue. The line was long, but not really that long. Folks were in good spirits. A woman talked about getting a free Webbs burger the last time the Brewers won 12 in a row, in 1987. A man grumbled about some kids from nearby Riverside University High School who were trying to cut in line. There were news crews.

Finally, at 2 o’clock, the line began to move. I slowly shuffled inside. I was handed a free burger. I walked out. And, um, that was it.

So, what to do now? I couldn’t just eat the thing. I had to do something. After all, this is the same website that once ate at every George Webb on planet Earth in a single day. Wasn’t there a story about a guy who still had his burger from 1987? Didn’t some guy bronze his? And that’s when it hit me:

I would construct a crude time capsule, put my free George Webb burger inside, and bury it in the woods. In exactly one year, I would unearth the thing and look at it.

Sixty minutes and one perplexed spouse later (me: “I need a box, some packing tape, and a shovel!”), I was in the woods.

I felt good about my impromptu time capsule. It had a picture of Uecker on the top and some Milwaukee Record stickers on the outside. I dated it. I sealed the burger in a ziplock bag. I double-bagged the entire box. I wrapped the thing in packing tape. I had failed to track down a shovel, so I dug a hole in the ground using the ice scraper from my car. I buried my free George Webb burger in a time capsule in the woods.

Now, about the unearthing part. Letting the thing sit there until the next time the Brewers win 12 in a row makes the most sense, but who knows how long that will be? Another 31 years? No, Ill unearth it exactly one year from the day I buried it. Maybe I’ll re-bury it after checking in on it, or maybe not. Either way, I’ll be sure to document the event. And no, I’ll never reveal where it’s buried. (It’s somewhere in Milwaukee County.)

See you on Friday, October 18, 2019. Go Brewers.

I dug up the free George Webb burger I buried in the woods one year ago and it was gross (2019)

By Matt Wild

On Thursday, October 18, 2018, I buried a free George Webb burger in a time capsule in the woods. I did this for several reasons: 1.) The Milwaukee Brewers had recently won 12 games in a row, and regional restaurant chain George Webb had made good on a longstanding promise to hand out free burgers to every man, woman, and child in Wisconsin. 2.) The last time the Brewers had won 12 in a row was back in 1987, and many people had done something interesting/weird with their free ’87 burgers, like freezing them or even bronzing them. 3.) I needed something to write about.

On October 14, 2019, I returned to the scene of my burger burial and made good on a promise I had made approximately one year prior. Yes, dear reader(s), I dug up my free, year-old George Webb burger from its now-festering grave and looked at it. It was gross.

Before I go any further, I have a confession to make. My original 2018 task/stunt had been carried out alone. But in 2019, I knew I would need a second pair of hands. With time running out and no friends willing to accompany me, I turned to the one person in the world I knew would do me a solid. After picking up my 5-year-old daughter from daycare and loading her into the car, I turned to her. “How would you like to help dad on an adventure?” I asked. “YES!” she replied. Rotten hamburger buried in a shallow grave, here we come!

(COMPLETELY UNRELATED: Remember that scene in Permanent Midnight where Ben Stiller is so desperate to get high he shoots up in the car beside his infant daughter? Yeah.)

Anyway, we arrived at Lake Park, grabbed the same ice scraper I had used in place of a shovel in 2018, and headed out. Oh, did I mention I buried the thing in Lake Park? I think I kept that a secret last year. Yeah, I buried it in Lake Park. You’ll never catch me alive, Milwaukee County Parks!

Thanks to some general location photos I had taken the year before, finding the exact location wasn’t difficult. What was difficult was navigating the mud, the soggy ground, and the standing water. My kid slipped a few times and grew increasingly wary of the whole “adventure.” I still have traumatic flashbacks of the time I was 8 and my family fled a campground during a thunderstorm. I pray my daughter might still grow up to be a productive member of society.

In case I didn’t make it clear, I didn’t just toss a hamburger in a hole and call it a day back in 2018. I wrapped it in plastic bags, put it inside a cardboard box, and then wrapped the whole thing in more plastic bags. I added some Milwaukee Record swag and adorned the box with a picture of Bob Uecker. Now, one year later, I was ready to unearth that package. I handed my daughter my phone. She started taking pictures. And…

Well, the box had pretty much turned to mush. And oh god, the smell. Clearly, I should have buried the thing better. Remember in Twin Peaks when Donna is crying at Laura’s grave and yells, “It’s like they didn’t bury you deep enough!” Yeah. Just like that. At least you could still see Uecker!

I slowly tore open the bag. I braced myself for the sight/smell of the actual burger. When I finally got to it, it looked…

Not bad? Pretty good? Seriously, the bun was in near-perfect condition. The patty had turned more than a little funky, but overall it wasn’t as awful as I had imagined. Turns out that while a cardboard box is no match for the elements, a George Webb burger is made of stronger stuff. Who knew! It was still pretty gross, though.

And that was that! I unearthed the free George Webb burger I had buried in the woods. I gathered the entire gloopy mess and tossed it in a garbage can. My kid had a fun time taking pictures.

As we were leaving, we passed an elderly couple walking through the park. “Hello,” I said, hoisting the ice scraper that was still covered in mud. The elderly couple gave us a funny look and hurried along.

“Dad,” my daughter said, “maybe we should wash the ice scraper.” “Good idea,” I said. We went to a nearby bathroom and cleaned it off. Another adventure in the books.

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