Every Friday, Off The Record looks to other Milwaukee publications (and beyond) for bits of news we missed throughout the week.

• To paraphrase The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy, the logic of Milwaukee parking rules is an illusion; the logic of Milwaukee winter parking rules, doubly so. Every year, from December 1 through March 1, the usual grumblings about the city’s Byzantine and ticket-happy parking regulations freeze over into everyone losing their shit about the city’s really fucked-up winter parking regulations. Which side can we park on tonight? Why did I get a ticket? Why did I get plowed in? AHHHHHHH!

Well, things are a bit simpler this year (emphasis on “a bit”). The so-called “4-inch rule,” which added a layer of complexity every time 4 or more inches of snow were on the ground, and which assumed all Milwaukeeans carried rulers with them at all times, is no more. As for the rest of the rules, the Journal Sentinel explains:

People should instead check their streets for any posted parking rules. The city’s Department of Public Works will also send notices to media outlets when DPW operations or snow emergencies are declared, but officials are urging residents to go to milwaukee.gov/mpw to sign up for Snow Mobile winter text and email alerts.

People can also call (414) 286-CITY or (414) 286-2489 for parking assistance.

When a DPW operation is called, city residents must park their cars on the even side of streets that allow overnight parking on even days and the odd side of those streets on odd days beginning at 11 p.m. to 6 a.m. the next day, officials said.

Oh, and the city is using some crazy green salt this year. [Milwaukee Journal Sentinel]

• Wait. La Fuente is closed? The La Fuente on 5th Street? Yep, the La Fuente on 5th Street is effectively closed, and will only be used as a “special event space” by its owner. And oh yeah: the Waukesha location is closed, too. Only La Fuente’s Wauwatosa location, 9155 W. Bluemound Rd., remains open. [OnMilwaukee]

• Wait. Shah Jee’s is adding two locations? The Shah Jee’s in the basement of that random office building on Jefferson Street? Yep, the glorious Pakistani restaurant is adding locations at 228 W. Wells St. and 3933 S. 76th St. later this month. “People are asking me to expand, so I said ‘This is the time,'” says owner Azhar Shah. [Milwaukee Business Journal]

• The new Northless record, Last Bastion Of Cowardice, is currently streaming/awesome. [Metal Injection]

• The entertainment complex outside the new Bucks arena is going to be slightly less entertaining. According to updated plans, one of the complex’s main buildings will now have room for only two tenants instead of four, and several floor-to-ceiling brew kettles pictured in previous renderings have been eliminated. Per the Journal Sentinel:

The brew kettles shown in the previous renderings were generally for aesthetics, said Bucks Senior Vice President Alex Lasry. It’s likely that the building will have a local craft brewery theme but it remains to be seen whether or not beer is actually brewed on the site, he said. [Milwaukee Journal Sentinel]

• Bay View alderman Tony Zielinski is running for mayor, apparently. [FOX6]

• Alpine Valley is reopening in 2018, apparently. [Shepherd Express]

• The new Snag/Social Caterpillar split is currently streaming/awesome. Buckle up for “To Chennai With The Skulls Of Our Lost Neighbors Dangling From Our Necks.” [Bandcamp]

• Mistral, the new Mediterranean-themed restaurant set to take over the Avalon Theater’s bar, will open December 11. “For all intents and purposes, we’re treating the restaurant as its own, with its own menu, and with its own staff,” executive chef Joe Schreiter said in September. [Milwaukee Business Journal]

• The always-awesome, always-changing Twin Brother is calling it quits. Happily, frontman Sean Raasch has already teased a new project. [Shepherd Express]


• Tom Bamberger turned a critical eye to the new Northwestern Mutual outdoor plaza and deemed it a “triumph.” [Urban Milwaukee]

• Have a great weekend, Milwaukee!

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Matt Wild weighs between 140 and 145 pounds. He lives on Milwaukee's east side.