The Milwaukee Boat—a.k.a. the S.S. Milwaukee, the S.S. Minnow, the Minnow, Deep Thought, or just “The Boat”—has been stranded between McKinley and Bradford beaches for exactly four months. Incredible.
You’ve read the exhaustive news coverage. You’ve listened to the song. You’ve purchased the (pre-graffiti) (still-available) T-shirt. And you’ve poured over the FAQ, which we’re reprinting and updating below. Happy four-month anniversary, Milwaukee Boat!
Q: Is the Milwaukee Boat still there?
A: Yes. As of this writing, it’s still there.
The Milwaukee Boat—a 33-foot, roughly 40-year-old Chris-Craft Roamer—has been there since October 13, 2024. Here’s the Milwaukee Boat just a few days into its extended stay, on October 18:
Here it is on January 6, 2025:
Here it is on February 1:
And here it is on February 13. We couldn’t get too close because the snow had hidden all the gaps between the rocks and we didn’t want to break a leg walking out there.
Q: Where is “there,” exactly?
A: On the icy shores of Lake Michigan, between Bradford Beach and McKinley Beach.
More precisely, the Milwaukee Boat is just south of MooSa’s Custard Stand, 2272 N. Lincoln Memorial Dr. You can find the Milwaukee Boat on Google Maps, where it’s listed as “The Minnow.” You can also totally see it from the road, peeking over the rocks.
Q: Does the Milwaukee Boat have an actual name?
A.: Yes. The Milwaukee Boat’s actual name is Deep Thought.
But we just call it the Milwaukee Boat. And we’re still not sure if Deep Thought is a reference to The Hitchhiker’s Guide To Galaxy, Jack Handy, or nothing in particular. (“The Minnow” is a Gilligan’s Island reference.)
Q: Does anyone know who the owners are?
A: Yes. The Milwaukee Boat belongs to a Mississippi couple, Richard and Sherry Wells.
According to the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, the Wells bought the boat in Manitowoc and planned to take it back to Mississippi via the Mississippi River. But the couple beached the boat on October 13 after they got stuck in a storm and ran out of gas. According to WISN 12, the Wells stayed in Milwaukee for two days and tried to free the boat from the sand; when that failed, they returned to Mississippi.
Q: Has anyone attempted to tow it since?
A: Yes. Crew members from commercial towing and salvage company Jerry’s Salvage have twice tried to tow the Milwaukee Boat—once on November 16, and once on December 30. Both attempts failed.
After the December attempt, a crew member from Jerry’s Salvage told the Journal Sentinel that the boat’s propeller is buried in two to three feet of sand, and that “when you pull it out, it almost beaches back up.” Still, the December attempt did result in the boat being moved a little. (It’s now more parallel to the shore than perpendicular.) Here’s a photo from the November operation:
Q: Why hasn’t the Coast Guard towed the boat?
A: Towing abandoned boats isn’t the Coast Guard’s thing, apparently.
Early on in the Milwaukee Boat saga, officials from the U.S. Coast Guard said that since no lives were in danger, and since the boat posed no environmental or safety issues, they would be leaving it alone. “Abandoned boats are sort of a no-man’s land,” Jerry Guyer of Jerry’s Salvage told the Journal Sentinel in January. “We don’t have any competition.”
Q: Do maritime salvage rights apply? Can I tow the Milwaukee Boat? Can I keep it?
A: Who knows!
We’re not lawyers, and we’re definitely not versed in maritime law, so feel free to Do Your Own Research.
Q: Wasn’t there a kayak on the boat at one point? A ladder?
A: Yes, but all that stuff has been removed.
It seems that Jerry’s Salvage has a lot of personal items that were once on the boat, and that they’re holding them for the owners. And yeah, there was occasionally a ladder on the thing.
Q: Who’s getting stuck with the bill for the Milwaukee Boat?
A: Don’t worry: it’s not the City, the County, or you, the taxpayer.
According to the Wells, the Coast Guard was charging them about $400 a day for the stranded boat. The couple plans to pay back Jerry’s Salvage, too, which says it has already spent about $20,000 in labor and equipment trying to tow the boat. Not that the Wells are thrilled with those numbers: “I don’t have that kind of money. I just don’t,” Sherry Wells told WISN 12 in January. A perhaps dubious GoFundMe set up to help the couple recoup their costs was shut down after raising $10.
But there’s a wrinkle: According to the Coast Guard, the Wells’ claim that they were being charged $400 a day is false. “The US Coast Guard is not charging any involved party any fees at this time,” a Coast Guard official told WISN 12 in January. “The statement claiming that the Coast Guard is charging the owners around $400 a day for the boat is false. Neither the salvage company nor the Coast Guard have been able to get in contact with the owners for several weeks, and this article is the first time we have heard anything from the owners since shortly after their boat became stranded last year.”
Q: What’s up with the “ALIENS” tag?
A: Local artists Therd and Emork tagged the Milwaukee Boat in mid-December.
We can tell it was them because the tag’s style and theme are similar to those found on the duo’s mural on the side of that window tinting joint on Humboldt Avenue—a.k.a. the mural that used to feature Mrs. Incredible and her absolute dump truck ass. Also, we can tell because they signed it:
Q: What’s up with the rest of the tags?
A: Yeah, people have tagging the shit out of this thing.
Soon after we did a piece about the “16 things spray-painted on (or stuck to) the frozen Milwaukee Boat,” folks starting going wild with the tags. It’s now really, really covered in graffiti. Eh, what are you gonna do? At least the back of the boat lives up to the craft’s official Deep Thought name.
Q: How long is the Milwaukee Boat expected to be there?
A: At least until spring.
Unless someone else gets to it first, Jerry’s Salvage expects the boat to stay put for a few more months. “We just have to wait for milder weather. There’s nothing else we can do,” Guyer told the Journal Sentinel.
Q: Didn’t somebody do a DJ set on the Milwaukee Boat?
A: Yes!
Here it is!
View this post on Instagram
Q: Didn’t somebody write a song about the Milwaukee Boat?
A: Yes!
Milwaukee Record‘s own Tyler Maas—along with Milwaukee musician Derek Mantz—wrote and recorded an original Milwaukee Boat song called “The S.S. Milwaukee.” It’s great! “At 4:30 long, it evokes Gordon Lightfoot,” says Tyler, “except it’s about a boat someone spray painted ‘ALIENS’ on instead of, like, the Edmund Fitzgerald.” The song is credited to The Roaring Dans, “a nod to Great Lakes timber pirate ‘Roaring’ Dan Seavey.”
Q: Is Milwaukee Record’s “Milwaukee Boat” T-shirt still available? Are you planning to do one with “ALIENS” on it?
A: Great question! Yes it is, and you can order one HERE. And no, we’re probably not doing an “ALIENS” variant.
We love you, Milwaukee Boat. Never change/move.
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