A lot of sex ed questions require long, thoughtful, sensitive responses to fully articulate the facts while respecting each person’s own situation and choices. Other sex ed questions are pretty clear cut. This week, I’m answering 10 questions in 25 words or less. All of these were submitted anonymously at live Ask The Sexpert events around the city in the last 12 months. Many of them have been asked repeatedly, which makes me believe that a lot of people have the same questions. If you’ve got other questions, send them to [email protected]. We’d love to help you out if we can.
Q. How many calories are in a load of semen?
A. Approximately five to seven, and that’s true for both male and female ejaculate.
Q. How much masturbation is too much?
A. There’s no such thing as too much masturbation. If you can pay your bills and maintain your outside relationships, you do you. Literally.
Q. Is there a term for having sex with your partner while they’re asleep?
A. Yes. Rape. Sleeping people can’t consent to sex (or anything else).
Q. I bought her flowers when she was having a really bad week. She just pushed me away even more. Is it possible to be “too nice”?
A. No, but you might have different definitions of “nice.” You should ask her what she needs when she’s down and do that.
Q. Can you transmit HPV orally?
A. You most certainly can. Chlamydia, gonorrhea, syphilis, and herpes can also be spread via unprotected oral sex.
Q. How long should lesbian fingering last?
A. How long do you have? As long as no one is chafing and everyone is having fun, take your time.
Q. Is there a certain etiquette in requesting to view a tattoo that is near the pubic area?
A. No, because you should never do that. People will offer to show you if they want you to see it.
Q. Can you get pregnant from swallowing? How about from anal?
A. No. But there’s a slim chance of pregnancy if the uncovered penis comes into contact with the vagina during sex play, even without ejaculation.
Q. How many times can a man be sexually aroused in 24-hour period?
A. Between zero and infinity. Every body is different. How many times can you be aroused? That’s the important question.
Q. If it feels good, should you do it?
A. Yes! Assuming all parties have given consent and done their research about the risks, go for it.
Curious about cunnilingus? Anxious about anal? Do you have questions about queefs or problems with your prostate? Lucky Tomaszek is the education coordinator at The Tool Shed: An Erotic Boutique, Milwaukee’s only mission-driven, education-focused sex toy store. Send her an email at [email protected] and she’ll get back to you with an answer.