Remember 8,000 years ago when people were eating/not really eating Tide Pods? Truly a more innocent time. Well, goofball Milwaukee indie rock outfit The Unitaskers remember. Last week, the band released its first batch of recordings, including a delightfully shambling, 105-second ode to Tide Pods called, well, “Tide Pods.” It’s also kind of an ode to the movie Hot Rod, WHICH WE’RE SCREENING AT AVALON THEATER JUNE 20. Tickets are still available.

Here’s the song:

And here are the lyrics, which are great:

Lost cause, sweat sock
Crunchier than a cockroach on a corn cob

Sad dog dot com
Cleaning up for a laundromat flash mob

Hodgepodge, got a dad bod
Sitting on the couch eating Tide Pods
While watching Hot Rod

Cool beans, cool beans
Cool beans, cool beans
Cool beans, cool beans
Cool beans, cool beans

The b-side to “Tide Pods” is the seven-plus-minute “Chicken Sashimi,” which contains these lyrics:

We were hanging out Yield’s balcony window
We were hanging at the Bradford Beach Club
We were talking ’bout the Globe in the 90s
We were drinking sours at The Hotel Foster

All four of those places are gone, but at least there are cat cafes now. We love you, Unitaskers. Sorry about that Pokemon thing during FemFest.

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Matt Wild weighs between 140 and 145 pounds. He lives on Milwaukee's east side.