Hey! Milwaukee! Let’s all chip in, raise about $249,000, buy the iconic Riverwest bar/hall/bowling alley Falcon Bowl, 801 E. Clarke St., and not turn it into something awful like luxury apartments or the city’s 74th food hall or whatever. How ’bout it?

Yes, Falcon Bowl is for sale. “Here’s your shot at owning an iconic piece of Milwaukee History,” reads a listing. “With over 12,000 square feet of business & living space this mixed use building consists of an event hall with a stage, back stage room, bar, & catering kitchen with a max capacity of 230 people, a main bar, a basement bowling alley and a 3 bedroom upper residential unit as well.” The asking price is $249,000.

Not included in the listing is an unspoken but implicitly understood agreement that whoever buys Nest 725 of the Polish Falcons of America—the last of its kind in the state, and built in 1882, for goodness’ sake—should absolutely not turn it into a mixed-use apartment building, a hotel, or a private residence. KEEP IT WEIRD AND BEAUTIFUL AND ALWAYS KIND OF STRANGELY BRIGHT AND HOT. Also, keep selling beer after 9 p.m., please.

Anyway, here are some pictures, courtesy of Riverwest Realty. Wow, the upper-floor apartment is incredible. Don’t blow this, Milwaukee.

About The Author

Co-Founder and Editor

Matt Wild weighs between 140 and 145 pounds. He lives on Milwaukee's east side.

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