Some Milwaukee things come and go, while some Milwaukee things become iconic. Mandatory Milwaukee is all about the latter. This week: taking out the window AC units because it’s gonna be cold for 8,000 months!

The summer was warm and beautiful. The fall has been mild and gorgeous. Then, one morning when you’re doomscrolling before work, an email appears in your inbox. As a longtime/probably-forever Milwaukee renter (homeowners: how?), it’s an email you know all too well. It’s from the company that owns your building. It reads:

“If exterior temperatures are below freezing and we see open windows or A/Cs still in place, we will consider it an emergency threat to the property and will enter your apartment to rectify the situation. Any window we must close for you or any A/C we must remove for you will result in a charge.”


Didn’t you just put those things in a few weeks ago? It feels that way, but never mind: It’s time to yank ’em out of their window sockets and lug them back down into your building’s creepy storage space. Fun!

Here we go…

And voilà! Just that easy!

And now…time to let them sit in your living room for three weeks before you work up enough motivation to lug them back down into your building’s creepy storage space. Fun! (Shit, ’tis the season for dusting off Horrified!)

Oh, and for what it’s worth, here’s what the Farmer’s Almanac has to say about Milwaukee winter 2023-24:

“Winter will be colder than normal, with the coldest periods in early and late December and from January through mid-February. Precipitation and snowfall will average above normal, with the snowiest periods occurring from late December through most of January and in mid-February.”


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Mandatory Milwaukee: Bringing the air conditioners up from storage because it’s gonna be 90 today

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Co-Founder and Editor

Matt Wild weighs between 140 and 145 pounds. He lives on Milwaukee's east side.