Crazy times, eh? With every venue, theater, and public space closed due to COVID-19 concerns, our normally bustling events calendar is pretty barren. So here’s what we’ll be watching, playing, reading, and listening to at home instead. Stay safe, Milwaukee.
MONDAY, MAY 4
Reno 911 on Quibi
After an 11-year hiatus, Reno 911—low-key one of the best and more innovative comedies of the early aughts—is back. Well, it’s sort of back. The series and its stacked cast returns for a seventh season, which will consist of seven-minute episodes shot vertically (optimal for smartphone viewing?) that can only be watched on Quibi. Do you have Quibi yet? Unless the new streaming platform has a Stella or Let’s Bowl reboot we haven’t heard about in the works, we couldn’t think of a better reason to start that free trial than new Reno 911.
Arctic Dogs on Netflix
Jeremy Renner, Heidi Klum, and James Franco provide the voices of CGI creatures in this 2019 children’s movie about a dog courier who, uh, enlists the help of a polar bear, a fox, and an albatross to stop a diabolical plan of an evil walrus voiced by John Cleese. Wait, what? This move grossed less than $10 million (compared to a $50 million budget), so we’re willing to bet you and your kids haven’t seen this one yet.
TUESDAY, MAY 5
Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours To Kill on Netflix
At an extremely dark, divided, and uncertain point in history, America needs to strong voice of a fearless humorist to tackle topics like “talking vs. texting, bad buffets vs. so-called ‘great’ restaurants, and the magic of Pop Tarts.” That’s right, Jerry Seinfeld has a new special. Who knows, maybe it’ll be a fun distraction from the ever-worsening nightmare that existence has swiftly become. You can stream Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours To Kill on Netflix starting Tuesday, May 5.
Natalie Wood: What Remains Behind on HBO
According to HBO—which will release Natalie Wood: What Remains Behind on Tuesday, May 5—the documentary “explores actor Natalie Wood’s life and career through the unique perspective of her daughter, Natasha Gregson Wagner, and others who knew her best. The film features previously unseen home movies, photographs, diaries, letters and artifacts, as well as intimate interviews with her friends, family, co-stars and colleagues; re-examining her personal and professional triumphs and challenges, which have often been overshadowed by her tragic death at age 43.”
WEDNESDAY, MAY 6
Becoming on Netflix
Premiering May 6, Becoming is a Netflix documentary that takes an intimate and extended look at Michelle Obama’s life, and follows the former first lady on her nationwide tour for her book (which is also called Becoming).
AEW Dynamite on TNT
Traditional sports might be paused for the time being, but professional wrestling is boldly (and almost irresponsibly) forging on. AEW, a months-old company that’s already giving WWE a run for its money, will air a new installment of AEW Dynamite.
THURSDAY, MAY 7
Conan on TBS
Last week, we recommended Conan O’Brien’s great podcast. This week, we’re shifting focus to the legendary humorist and late night host’s eponymous TBS talk show. In spite of the pandemic, Conan is still making new episodes (four per week), complete with video chats between Coco and a wide variety of interesting guests. Thursday’s guest is Lizzy Caplan. Hopefully they play Animal Crossing: New Horizons or something.
The Conners (season finale) on ABC
Remember when everyone was all excited about the Roseanne reboot? Well, that obviously didn’t last long. Following a Twitter tirade from the show’s star and namesake, ABC decided to kill her off the show and rebrand the program as The Conners. While we haven’t really been keeping up on it, the Roseanne-free variant has seemed to enjoy mostly favorable reviews and surprisingly steady ratings. Thursday’s episode is the Season 2 finale.
FRIDAY, MAY 8
Dead To Me (Season 2) on Netflix
The first season of Netflix’s outstanding series, Dead To Me, chronicled the grief and personal hardships, the unique friendship, and the dark secret between two women (played by Christina Applegate and Linda Cardellini). After leaving it all on the table and ending Season 1 with a bang…literally, Dead To Me returns for Season 2, which can be streamed in its entirety starting May 8.
Solar Opposites on Hulu
“A team of four aliens escape their exploding home world only to crash land into a move-in ready home in suburban America.” That’s the premise of a new animated Hulu original series from the makers of Rick And Morty. Break out the szechuan sauce and something something Pickle Rick (okay, so we don’t know anything about Rick And Morty—sorry!) and tune in for the series premiere of Solar Opposites on May 8.
Hayley Williams, Petals For Armor
Singer Hayley Williams has managed quite an impressive career (which started during her early teens) as the inimitable front woman of Paramore. Though the band still appears to be active, Williams is taking a solo turn. Her emotionally exposed debut solo effort, Petals For Armor, will be released Friday, May 8.
SATURDAY, MAY 9
Oh, Hello: The P’dcast
After stealing scenes with “Too Much Tuna” on Kroll Show and subsequently taking Broadway by storm, the dynamic duo of George St. Geegland (John Mulaney) and Gil Faizon (Nick Kroll) are ready to continue their comedic crusade in the world of podcasting. With “Oh, Hello: The P’dcast,” the pair of oft-offensive and hilariously out-of-touch Upper West Siders are boldly investigating the death of Prince Diana. Between the incredible St. Geegland and Faizon characters, the batshit crazy concept, and the contributions from interesting guests like John Oliver and Pete Davidson, you should add this show to your queue. New episodes come out Friday, but since nothing new comes out Saturdays, we’ll recommend you listen to our My First Band podcast on Friday and then make your way to this on Saturday.
The Goldfinch on Amazon Prime
When we saw the preview for this 2019 film about, like, a magic painting everyone seems to want, we intended to see it. But, much like the vast majority of moviegoers who didn’t contribute to the box office bust’s mere $9.9 million theatrical take, we never got around to it. That will probably change shortly after The Goldfinch makes its way to Amazon Prime starting Friday, May 8. Realistically, we’re probably not getting to this one until at least May 9.
SUNDAY, MAY 10
The Simpsons on FOX
They’re still making new Simpsons episodes, right? Check out the latest episode from Season 31 (!) of the iconic and incomparable animated series or, better yet, just watch any episode from Season 3 through about Season 12 instead.
Jack And Jill on Amazon Prime
Part of what helped make Adam Sandler’s performance in Uncut Gems so commendable is the fact the polarizing actor isn’t very far removed from starring in far-less-acclaimed films like Pixels, That’s My Boy, and this movie. Jack And Jill is quite possibly The Sandman’s most critically-panned film of his long and varied acting career. To be honest, we’ve never seen it, but we’re willing to bet the 2011 brother-sister movie—wherein Sandler plays both roles—makes You Don’t Mess With The Zohan and Grown Ups 2 seem like Oscar contenders by comparison. Jack And Jill is coming to Amazon Prime starting May 10 and, since there’s no premium on spare time and there isn’t much else to do, you know we’re spending our socially distant Mother’s Day watching it.