Dear MKE SEX,
I keep hearing my friends talk about going out to clubs, meeting guys, and then going home to have sex with them. But then when they get home, if the dude is drunk, he can’t get it up. One of my friends calls this whiskey dick, and it makes her so mad! Is whiskey dick real? And if so, what is it exactly?
Thanks,
Learning on the Sideline
Dear Sideline,
Yes, for some people, whiskey dick is a real thing.We mostly think of whiskey dick exactly the way you described: a dude-type person has too much to drink, and then they can’t get a hard-on even if they’re really turned on. But WD can manifest differently, too. You can get a nice, serviceable hard-on but not be able to have an orgasm or ejaculate.
It’s important to note that WD can happen to people of all sexes and genders. We tend to focus on erectile dysfunction of the penis for a couple of different reasons. First, it’s far more visible than erectile dysfunction in the vulva and clitoris. And second, our culture assumes that anyone with penis should be able to get it up and have sex with it at any point. We falsely equate a man’s worth with his ability to get and stay hard, and that’s so damaging. Make no mistake, though. Alcohol can impair sexual function and pleasure for anyone.
While having a drink or two can definitely make people feel frisky, much more than that can impair your production of oxytocin, the hormone responsible for physical arousal and orgasm. It can also elevate your production of prolactin, which is the hormone satiation. Typically we have a spike of prolactin after orgasm, telling our brains that we’ve had enough. So with decreased oxytocin and increased prolactin, our bodies are pretty sure that we really don’t want sex right now, thank you very much.
If you know you want to bump uglies with that cutie later in the evening, moderate your drinking accordingly. Or better yet, hold off on the booze ’til after the sex, since drunk people can’t consent anyway. Your sex will probably more enjoyable, and it will definitely be more legal, if you fuck first and drink later.
Knowing that WD can happen to anyone, I went in search for a new, non-gendered term. Big thanks to my Facebook friends who eagerly contributed these gems:
Un-bumpable uglies
No-go fucko
Drunken junken
Dry bumpers
Whisky un-frisky
Liquor let-down
Curious about cunnilingus? Anxious about anal? Do you have questions about queefs or problems with your prostate? Lucky Tomaszek is the education coordinator at The Tool Shed: An Erotic Boutique, Milwaukee’s only mission-driven, education-focused sex toy store. Send her an email at [email protected] and she’ll get back to you with an answer.