Stocks have been tumbling, yet the richest have gotten richer. High prices are escalating. People are hearing the word “tariff” so much they want to jump off a damn bridge. Still, we have some good news to report on the economic front. Milwaukee Record continues to pay contributing writers to play Super Nintendo for the purpose of trying to predict wins for Wisconsin sports teams. Thus far, we are 0-for-1 sending good mojo, yet somehow, we have total confidence in this new trend of capitalism. Take that, economists.
As we near the NBA playoffs, trusting the Bucks in NBA Jam is a redemption story on a couple of fronts. Our Griffey Jr. Baseball prediction of a win on Opening Day was a bust. We held up our end of the deal by eking out a 2-1 victory, but the real Brewers got torpedoed by the vile Yankees, 4-2. That’s one reason why we want redemption.
Secondly, Milwaukee Record has a history with the Bucks’ NBA Jam duo of Brad Lohaus and Theodore “Blue” Edwards. Back in 2017, we gave the pair a retrospective titled “Brad and Blue: Remembering the shittiest team on ‘NBA Jam.’” We could have used nicer words to describe Brad and Blue, but the fact remains, they repped a dismal era for the Bucks. The playoff teams of the ‘80s led by All-Stars like Sidney Moncrief and Terry Cummings had missed their window and disbanded. The team had yet to acquire Lottery picks Glenn Robinson and Ray Allen to mark their return to relevance. In the ‘92-’93 season, Milwaukee finished 28-54. Brad and Blue were the Jam “leaders” by default.
Thankfully, we have a way to overcome the middling skills of the Milwaukee duo. As it turns out, we’re really good at NBA Jam. We have sacrificed a great deal of time and effort at the expense of becoming better writers, journalists, citizens, spouses, lovers, role models, and parents—all for the sake of honing our Jam skills. No regrets!
Standing between us and triumph were the Indiana Pacers. Their pair is composed of Reggie Miller, a five-time All-Star who mastered the three-point shot years before it was en vogue. His bravado and fearlessness in crunch time earned him Hall of Fame accolades. His teammate, Derrick McKey, was less of a stud but still no slouch. He was an elite defender who averaged 13.4 points per game the year Jam was released. With Brad and Blue, we were the underdogs, but were we scared? Nah. This felt nothing like playing Doom with the lights off. It was more like that level of Super Mario World where you first meet Yoshi.
The game began with Brad Lohaus winning the jump ball over Reggie Miller. The Pacers should’ve conceded defeat right then, but they persisted. Blue Edwards got possession and wasted no time driving to baseline. He got McKey out of a position for a split-second and splashed a pretty teardrop. On Indiana’s first possession, Lohaus got a steal, which he converted into a layup. Lohaus soon picked McKey’s pockets to force a second turnover. The Buck stopped on a dime and netted a short jumper. Milwaukee was up 6-0 in the first 30 seconds. Indiana would never have the lead. If we’re being lousy storytellers by taking away the suspense, remember, we sacrificed a lot to get really good at this video game. Oh man, what a fulfilling life this has been!
With time running low in the first half, Blue skyrocketed for a reverse jam. The announcer dropped a catchphrase: “He’s on fire!” This was in tandem with the game’s narrator, who proclaimed “Holy Guacamole!” The slogans flowed like a Lohaus finger roll.
The score at halftime was 34-15. Blue entered the third quarter On Fire and promptly drilled a three-ball–fiery like the sun, with the tail of a comet. We have one last sequence to describe in what turned out to be a glorious Pacers thrashing for Bucks fans. In the fourth quarter, with Miller and McKey notably dead on the inside, Blue shoved the ball loose from the eventual Hall of Famer before he could attempt a corner three. Our Milwaukee duo began to sprint in transition together. Blue bounced a slick pass to Lohaus just as he crossed the three-point arch. Lohaus then elevated 20 feet above the rim and brought down thunder for two points.
We like to think Miller and McKey were openly weeping as the former tried another desperate three–only to lose possession on a push by Lohaus. Brad launched a behind-the-back pass to Blue on the baseline, who soared into the damn stratosphere and (eventually) hammered it home.
Thanks to our 68-37 demolition of the Pacers, Milwaukee fans can feel confident in the 2025 squad’s chances of giving Indiana a first-round knockout. Maybe this is a bit late for real analysis, but even with Damian Lillard sidelined (and with his health still in question due to blood clots), the Bucks finished red hot, with eight straight victories. Giannis just had a low-key MVP-caliber season. His fellow champ Bobby Portis is back from suspension. Don’t forget about Splash Mountain. Kyle Kuzma can ball. Contributors like Gary Trent Jr. and Kevin Porter Jr. are gaining confidence. Minus Dame, they’ve found chemistry. (By the way, we’d still love to see Dame return.)
The rematch of Milwaukee and Indiana starts on Saturday, April 19 at noon. In last season’s first round, Haliburton, Siakam, and the Pacers got the best of the Bucks in six games. Oh well. That just means we get to enjoy another redemption story. If Brad and Blue can do it, so can these Bucks.