The following piece by Chris Lay was originally published on Tone Madison.

Given the last-minute shifting of guest star schedules at this weekend’s Wizard World comics convention at the Alliant Energy Center (nine major guest cancellations so far, which threw our coverage earlier this week all out of whack), you’d be forgiven for missing out on one notable recent addition: Kato Kaelin. That’s right, not only is the former resident of OJ’s guest house blessing Madison with his presence, but according to a batshit crazy twitter post, apparently he’s brought along his dubious-sounding boat that somehow “sleeps 44.” He followed that up with a Brewers-bashing tweet screed crazy enough to warrant its own post over at Deadspin.

It doesn’t look like Kato’s last-minute presence at the local con has warranted much coverage on the actual Wizard World site. Craven click-grabbing site EatDrinkMadison somehow beat the event organizers to the punch, landing a puffy little interview with the future emcee of Wizard World’s “entertainment stage.”

Somehow even in the short meeting-of-the-shill-minds that is happening here, Kaelin comes off as about as unlikeable as you’d expect, peppering his responses to breezy questions with some truly arcane name-drops:

“I got involved with WW because the current CEO John Maatta saw me do some hosting at an event with the First Lady of Belize, and I guess he liked it. He called me late night from the Austin Wizard World show and hired me over the cell phone. BTW, John also ran the WB network and started the CW network.”

Emphases ours.

In an interview ostensibly designed to promote a comic con, Kaelin inexplicably makes sure to oh-so-casually point out that he’s “been fortunate enough to make friends with Packers and Brewers front office people,” big-up his family’s cottage in Lac du Flambeau, and coin quite possibly the least useful portmanteau the english language has ever seen: KatoRoake.

When asked for a funny anecdote about his previous Wizard World emcee gigs, Kaelin offers up “a two-year-old baby Hulk running wild on stage only to pause for 30 seconds to load his diaper with gamma rays!” So, someone who doesn’t know any better taking a big crap on stage…? Sounds about right.

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Tone Madison covers music and culture in Madison, Wisconsin. Our journalism reflects a smart, curious, complex, and flawed city.