Today marks the glorious first day of the 2022 Wisconsin State Fair. From August 4-14, hundreds of thousands of proud Wisconsinites will flock to the State Fair Grounds in West Allis to take in all the sights, sounds, and zany food the fest has to offer. Want to watch some racing pigs? The State Fair has you covered. Want to catch Nelly, The Oak Ridge Boys, Tesla, and Charlie Berens live on stage? The State Fair has your back. Sing it, Pat McCurdy!

Oh, and don’t forget about the midway—a.k.a. Spin City. It’s filled with countless attractions, games, and rides that are absolutely-completely-110% safe! Don’t believe us on the last bit? Then travel through time (via YouTube) and watch oodles of local TV news reports on how the State Fair rides are indeed absolutely-completely-110% safe. Seriously: they’re safe. They’re inspected. They’re inspected again. They’re inspected again. Safety isn’t funny, but the fact that ride-inspection stories are apparently a mandated thing for local media is. Just us? Well, enjoy anyway.