We’re entering Day 3 of every Milwaukee man, woman, and child sharing that Vogue article on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. You know the article: “Why Milwaukee Is the Midwest’s Coolest (and Most Underrated) City.” Yes, Milwaukee hasn’t been the same since Vogue wrote some nice things about us and topped it with a picture of Atwater Beach in Shorewood. Let’s enjoy it while it lasts, because Cincinnati, Des Moines, or Kekoskee will likely be the Midwest’s coolest (and most underrated) cities next week!

Or maybe we shouldn’t enjoy it? Maybe, for the sake of affordability and not becoming as insufferable as, say, Portland in 10 years, we should keep people away from Milwaukee? That’s the (obviously tongue-in-cheek, so calm down) message from Milwaukee musician Pete Freeman in an untitled ditty posted to Facebook. “Please, please, take my word for it / The beer is bad, the food it stinks, and the water tastes like shit,” sings Freeman while seated in front of a Wisconsin map and some nice plants. “Please, please don’t do as I do / Stay far away, keep nice and safe, go find some place that’s cool.”

 

No need to alert the Hater Police on this one, because Freeman is obviously having a chuckle (just like us!), and we doubt he really thinks Milwaukee is “Shithole U.S.A.” Instead, take a positive puff piece for what it is, and continue to strive to make Milwaukee a better place for everyone. Oh, and listen to Freeman’s new EP, Summer Of Pete, which we hadn’t heard until now but geez, it’s pretty great and it has a song called “Fishing Shirt.”