It’s happened to all of us: You’re staring off into space, alone, tired, afraid, wondering if the Miller Park roof will be open for the day’s big game. A quick peek outside tells you the weather is certainly nice enough, but hey, you never know. Maybe there’s rain in the forecast. Maybe there’s snow. The Brewers aren’t playing until 7:10 p.m., after all, and anything could change. What to do? What to do…
You check the Miller Park Roof Twitter account, but it hasn’t been updated since 2011. You start to sweat. You find a website called Stadium Roof Status, but it’s nothing but an endless list of TBDs. You start to panic. You’re lost. Confused. Frightened.
It’s then that you remember: Of course! The Miller Park Roof Hotline! You grab your phone, dial 414-902-4636, and listen…
I’ve found myself calling the Miller Park Roof Hotline a lot lately (sad but true), and I can’t quite explain why. Maybe it’s the old fashioned charm of calling a phone number—a hotline, no less—which seems so appropriate for the Brewers and Milwaukee in general. Maybe it’s the imagined communal aspect of a phone call, where, much like They Might Be Giants’ old Dial-A-Song service, you can imagine someone else, somewhere, listening to the same recording as you. Maybe it reminds me of Moviephone. Or maybe I just like the idea of some guy at Miller Park sitting down every day and dutifully recording a message about whether the roof will be open or not. It’s strangely delightful.
And let’s face it: Brewers fans need to hold on to the strangely delightful this season. Whether it’s a Bob Uecker talking alarm clock or, well, Bob Uecker himself, the non-game-related ephemera offered up by the club during its current rebuilding year is incredibly important. Calling the Miller Park Roof Hotline at all hours of the day (again, sad but true) may not translate to a winning team, but it reminds me that the Brewers are Milwaukee’s team, my team, and that it’s someone’s job to keep me updated on the opened-or-closed status of the roof. It’s the little things. Go Brewers.