Who Said It Best (And Worst) is a new feature that rounds up the best and worst quotes of the week from notable Milwaukee figures, pundits, and folks-about-town.

SAID IT BEST
Fox6 anchor Ted Perry, on Milwaukee Day:

“Tomorrow, April 14, is 414 Day, a clever play on numbers, a day when the calendar and the area code are aligned. It’s a kitschy celebration of Milwaukee started by a very well-meaning group of people who love this city. And it’s a city in need of a little bit of love right now.

“But which Milwaukee gets celebrated? Surely not the one where a legitimate, tragic accident ends up not in one death, but three, thanks to ridiculous rage and violence. And not the one where too many stolen cars have become entertainment for teens, and sadly the weapons of death for innocent couples caught in the paths of those so-called joy rides.

“There are those who are content to let crimes like that define the city. It gives them reasons to make statements like, “I’ll never drive down a Milwaukee street ever,” as if their absence will fix anything. This city has, as we all do, serious flaws. But it has people who love it unconditionally as well. It has billionaires wanting to invest in it. It has the energy, the will, and the smarts to fix itself, should it choose to do so. And THAT is the city that deserves a toast tomorrow.

“Happy 414 Day, Milwaukee. Have a few for me—I have to work. And then call a cab. We have enough problems to deal with right now.”

Perfectly said, sir.

SAID IT WORST
NEWaukee founder Ian Abston, on Milwaukee pride:

“There are two types of people who don’t like Milwaukee: those who have never been here and those who never left.”

There isn’t a scientific instrument powerful enough to measure the sheer douchiness of this quote—especially the second part. Lived here all your life and/or don’t have the means or desire to live elsewhere? Then you probably hate Milwaukee, you piece of shit, and have no part in its future as envisioned by a bunch of marketing major Poochies. Ugh.