If there’s one piece of news Milwaukeeans can count on hearing about time and time again—other than the streetcar, the Grand Ave., and Bar Rescue—it’s the plight of Silk Exotic and its never-ending quest to open a location in or near Downtown Milwaukee. For years, the “upscale gentlemen’s club” has gone before the city’s Licensing Committee with proposed locations—ranging from a site near the BMO Harris Bradley Center to the old Ladybug Club—only to be unceremoniously swept away like so many folded singles. And for years, readers have been kept abreast of the situation by local media pundits, including OnMilwaukee’s Dave Begel, who really, really, really knows a thing or two about strip clubs. But today, Silk…oh, fuck it. Here’s a clip from that Begel piece:

“Let me start by saying I have been in strip clubs in big cities and small towns. I have been in clubs out in the boondocks. I have been in clubs where the next nearest structure was a barn. I have been in strip clubs in probably 30 or states and at least six or seven countries. I’ve been in clubs with two dancers and in clubs with 30 dancers. I’ve been in clubs that serve alcohol and those that don’t.”

Where were we? Oh, right. Today, Silk owner Jon Ferraro will go before the Licensing Committee yet again. According to Fox 6, Ferraro hopes to house his club in one of two locations: South 5th Street and West Virginia; or South Barclay and Walker. If he’s successful (Ferraro says he feels “the best I’ve felt going in”), there will finally be a strip club in a general area of Milwaukee that continually claims it doesn’t want a strip club, even though it already has two. If unsuccessful, Ferraro and Silk will likely wander aimlessly through the crowd, ask if you saw their last performance, and wait for a tip.

UPDATE (12/11/14): Denied.

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Matt Wild weighs between 140 and 145 pounds. He lives on Milwaukee's east side.