After getting some shit in the comments section from readers who didn’t agree with our ringing anti-endorsement of an overrated alcohol-based marketing exercise (better known as “Schlitz”), we decided to take a deeper look into the beer that “Made Milwaukee Famous.” Our tireless search for any redeeming aspect of the now-Los Angeles-based brew led us down some pretty crazy wormholes—the most terrifying of which is a YouTube video that features a ventriloquist’s dummy performing a “cover” of Jerry Lee Lewis’ warbling tale of alcoholism at the hands of Schlitz (or beer in general), “What Made Milwaukee Famous.”

We were among the first 55 people to see this, and we’ll never be the same. Warning NSF-Life images to follow.

It’s an altogether off-putting 2:47-long work of nightmare fuel that doubles as an unsolicited audition for the next Saw movie. If you’re feeling bold, stick around until the end, when the dummy says, “Thank you. Goodnight.” Now if you’ll excuse us, we’re going to try to find a happy place.